The Ridiculousness of Time

5 years ago. . . .

I don't even know what to say.  I have a million stories, probably more photos than that, and two kids upstairs who may or may not be sleeping who turn five tomorrow.

Five.  FIVE.  I can't even wrap my head around it.  Yesterday, this happened.

I registered my babies for Kindergarten.  It seems like just yesterday, and like 100 years ago, that we were new parents of two tiny little babies.  My tiny little babies can write their own names, buckle their own seat belts, and are the best of friends and worst of enemies.

I was rereading the first of these, the birthday eve blog from the night before they were ours.  And I wanted to update on something I wrote.  5 years ago tonight, this was in my post.

I totally had this meltdown awhile ago, but this is what I want. I want us to raise nice kids. I want them to be kind. I don't care if they are smart, or athletic, or artistic. I want them to be the kids who say please and thank you, to be kind to old people. To be the kids who will stand up for someone who's being bullied. To have empathy and sweetness, and to understand people. Starting tomorrow, it is up to us.  

And they are.  I have heard from multiple people just how sweet my kids are.  They are good, they are kind, and they help out friends who need them.  Just tonight, Ben went down the stairs after Mia (we were supposed to be putting away laundry - it wasn't going well) and I heard him moving something around downstairs.  What had he done?  He went and emptied the dryer and brought the basket to the bottom of the stairs.  He said he wanted to do something nice for me because of all the nice things I do for them.  Are you kidding me?  I could have cried.

They are smart.  Oh but they are smart.  We still aren't quite reading, but they can read the pictures in books, and recognize letters, and are starting to sound things out.  Maggie has been writing everything.  She likes to write a bunch of letters together and ask me what it spells.  She likes to add things to the shopping list.  She asks me to spell names, and fruits, and to write things for her friends.

Ben out of the blue started writing his name.  BEN M on everything.  He is Ben M., the good Ben, the kind Ben, the one who listens to his teacher at school.  The one who loves dogs, and his stuffed cats, and who can't sleep if his room isn't clean.  He worries, oh how he worries, and when he has done something wrong, you can see the way his heart breaks from being disappointed.  He runs, and skips, and kicks balls around telling me he is just exercising.  He loves books, and Martha Speaks, and dragons.  He dresses himself and is a pretty snappy dresser.  He learned recently how to fold socks, he can open things that are supposed to be childproof and has imagination and a strong sense of what is right and what is fair, that he will passionately argue with you if he believes you are wrong.  Which is frequent.  He could be a lawyer.  He could do something with animals or people.  He is kind, caring, and is sensitive to other kids feelings.  I couldn't be more proud of having him as my kid.

Maggie is probably more like me than I even know, and it is both a very cool thing, and a very frustrating thing.  She is smart, she is sweet, and she likes to help Mommy however she can.  But, she is messy, she has the most tendency to get distracted when she is supposed to be helping, and is just a wee bit sensitive to things like boo boos.  And words.  And Ben.   

But she snuggles and clings like a spider monkey when you have to wake her up in the morning.  She is always very quick to answer a question, knows all her letters and how to count to a lot, as long as you help her with the 20, 30, 40 part.  She has quite a fashion sense.  Andy finally got her closet organizer together so she can finally reach her own clothes, and it has made preschool interesting.  If she could wear a dress or a skirt with leggings every day she would.  The fancier the better, and colors that match are not necessary.  Mia would follow her to the end of the earth.  She loves both of them, but right now Maggie is her best friend and constant companion.  The two of them like to do "girl" things like tea parties, and dress up and dance parties in the basement.  I hope that they are always best friends who love each other, support each other, and go to each other when they are sad.  

5 is kind of a big deal.  

  

  

And now, they need to stop growing.  Because the fact that tomorrow I have to tell people I have five year old twins is just ridiculous.  Five is kindergarten, and learning to read, and losing teeth.  It seems like magic, and stories, and pretending and being independent.  

Happy Birthday Ben and Maggie.  With everything I ever pictured before you were born, I had no idea just how wonderful and sweet you would be.  I am so proud of you and I can't wait to see you grow.  Such a strange feeling, wanting to know what you will be come, but wanting you to stay exactly the same forever because there are moments I want to just freeze in time.  

Babies no more.  But my babies forever.